Thursday, 10 December 2009


Hey sassy geeks! This may seem like a random piece of info to start a blog with, but for the past week, I've been working in a library.

I actually chose to work there (well, what would you expect from a geek like me?)for work experience. There's a certain stereotype about librarys and the people who work there: lots of shushing, bad dress sense, possible attacks from the vashta nerada... All in all, doesn't sound like a great job?

Well, in its own funny way, it is! You learn to amuse yourself - whether its by drawing pictures on post-it notes and sticking them all over your computer, or just having a good giggle about the crazy clients - some of my favourites -

The Woman With the Deer - This lady came in asking for a book about deer; no explanation, or anything! Even more surprsingly, we had one - a kids' book. So the perfectly nice, average looking woman sat in the kids' section with her picture book for an hour or so!

Mr Beardy - Picture a man - baseball cap; long grey beard, accesorised with bushy eyebrows; grubby, long nailed fingers with skull rings on them. Not exactly male model material. This dude had one of the most complex queries ever - He wanted to return CDs, pay a small fraction of his (astronomical) fines on them - take the same CDs out again, plus two new ones. And he said "cool" too much for a gentlemen of his age.

Mrs "I Believe Miracles Happen, Courtesy of Super Librarian" - One of my favourite customers, this lady was requesting (in all seriousness) a book which had not yet even been released in the shops! I tried so hard to humour the poor wee woman. Yet, still she seemed to believe that we couldn't perform this impossible task due to some fault of mine!

The Ex-Con - This story is rather sad. A man came in - bit overweight, slurring his words - and asked for a renewal of his expired card. Expired, it turned out because he'd been in prison. It had almost forty pounds of fines on it. The gentleman in question proceeded to explain to me about the breakdown of his marriage, and just who had put him in the jail. Bit sad, a lot scary.

Quirky Old Men - From Charming to Pervy - There's one nice(ish) old fella, who comes in daily. He dresses up smart, with a long coat and a big umbrella. He gives all us gals (and less often the guys) a chocolate each day. Lovely no? No. They're free from a nearby bar - typical after-dinner mints. The other man is less charming:

Put it this way. If we were in ancient Rome, his name would be Oldmanis Pervus Totalis. He made the charming comment to my male colleague that his perfect library would have a "topless librarian". Charmant!

And true, in quiet moments, libraries can be boring. But I think I prefer that to a heart-attack inducing rush of "quirky" (here read "mental") customers. And if I get bored, at least there's plenty to read!